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Stoner, writer, I appreciate twisted humor, supernatural/fantasy things, horror films, hard rock, hair metal, new wave, acid rock, psychedelic rock, 60s/70s counterculture, Halloween, and fall. I also like fancy rats, cats, Chihuahuas, snakes, and ferrets.

About four years, I was diagnosed with a nonverbal learning disorder, chronic depression, social anxiety disorder, and generalized anxiety disorder and I have struggled with panic attacks and bouts of depression periodically since high school. I have also suspected Asperger Syndrome in addition to these issues I have but I was never evaluted for it. I rarely get meltdowns but when I do, I usually end up freaking the fuck out and my mind disconnects itself from my body. It’s not a fun experience. Having a nonverbal learning disorder also means that I have poor social skills and I cannot read body language or understand another person’s voice tone. I do understand spoken sarcasm but it’s not funny. My sense of humor is offbeat and I am always worrying that I will lose the current friends I have if I am always talking to them or I will say something that is going to offend them. I also have issues expressing my emotions or telling others how I feel about them whether or not they make me feel uncomfortable or if I find them attractive.

For the past few days, it feels my old insecurities about myself are resurfacing and that I am not good enough for anyone to want to talk to me or even look my way as I feel like I’m an obese, pimply faced, socially awkward, unempathetic bitch. My love life is non-existent and the only people I attract creep me the fuck out. The men I am attracted to would never look my way and it does hurt. Imagine not having sex for over a year because you cannot approach those who you have a crush on and are afraid of rejection. I feel like I should change myself just that others will like me better instead of truly liking me for my quirks. 

I  also feel like I am out of the loop on most things and due to the previous mentioned lack of social skills, my way of talking to people come across as me being nosy and it’s bad enough that I can’t tell if someone is lying to me or manipulating me. I want to connect with others but people always assume I don’t want to and it hurts when they do.  I feel like I don’t fit in anywhere and it makes me feel alone, even when I’m with a crowd of people. The feeling of loneliness is not a happy one and my heart always aches because of it.

pepperandpals:

Pls helb poof birb obtain millet seeb.

pepperandpals:

Pls helb poof birb obtain millet seeb.

ppyajunebug:

Wayne Brady has reached the level of Eternal Scout

narcissamafoy:

Haven’t you always wondered what was the reason for the connection between you, and the Dark Lord? 

egberts:

important

Dignified ferrets.

egberts:

important

Dignified ferrets.

toothless-the-alpha:

Toothless being absolutely adorable by anon request

I used to have this as a poster on my bedroom wall.

I used to have this as a poster on my bedroom wall.